Be a MATE in Division 9 - addressing domestic and family abuse in our community.
With 15 schools in and adjacent our local divisional area, there’s no doubt the the family unit is a central part of our community strength and resilience. One threat to that is the scourge in our city, like much of Australia, of domestic and family abuse. If it hasn’t happened to us personally, we know a man or a woman we are friends with impacted by it. In Division 9, we’ve decided to act on the issue.
A few months ago, we commenced a partnership with Griffith University and the MATE Bystander program.
We kicked off with a presentation from the team at She Is Not Your Rehab, a NZ-based program that has had excellent success raising the profile of the domestic and family violence issue in their communities of influence. Over 100 people from our community registered and turned up to participate. It was clear it was not just us who were passionate about making a difference in this area.
Panel discussion at “She Is Not Your Rehab” event, held at Somerset College, Mudgeeraba
I gave a short speech at the event and the transcript follows, introducing the issue locally and why I think we should try to make our community safer and stronger through this partnership.
“I would like to kick off by acknowledging the Kombumerri people, who are the traditional custodians of the land on which we meet, paying my respect to elders past, present and emerging.
I also know local Kombumerri families would be pleased to acknowledge other elders in the room, from the Samoan community, from the broader church community, and from other First Nations or cultural groups who are with us tonight. In this community we respect our elders and you are all part of that. Thank you.
For those of you who don’t know, I represent about 45,000 residents who live in the south-west of the City of Gold Coast; from the NSW border, up to just south of Nerang, west of the M1 out to the Scenic Rim. It’s a big area characterised lots of neighbourhood villages in the valleys, acreages and farms and a few larger centralised suburbs closer to the highway. With so many schools in and adjacent our area; there’s about 15 of them; young families are a big part of our community. We’ve also got a large recreational sporting community, with footy teams and netball clubs and little athletics, as well as a flourishing community precinct that includes the Mudgeeraba Show Society and a variety of other interest groups and action groups that help people in need.
Communities and Neighbourhoods are a really central and important element of who we are in Division 9 and amongst the Mudgeeraba and hinterland areas. We look after each other, we see need and we reach out to help people. That is who we are.
It’s for some of these reasons we’ve embarked on this project, trying to tackle Domestic and Family Violence and Abuse. As a dad of three boys, who has gone through a divorce and some messy relationship times, I know how important my personal community of support was to addressing those seasons of conflict. Funnily enough, I remember talking to my barber, talking to a local church Pastor, talking to a few of the guys on my basketball team, and even staying with a family of 6 for a time during a particularly difficult season. If not for that support, I don’t know where I’d be.
When I was approached to support this event and speakers, which has a connection to a barber shop, I could see how tonight’s story, from Matt and Sarah at She Is Not Your Rehab, might help show people the work they can do to make our community better, to make themselves better, and show our kids how we manage difficult seasons.
While this event tonight is hopefully just the first of a few initiatives, I have three aspirations embarking on this series of projects to start conversations about domestic and family violence in our area;
The first relates to our Police, who I’m informed spend over 53% of their time dealing with DV and related interventions and paperwork. For every minute they are doing that sort of work, they can’t address other community safety issues, like crime or traffic and vehicle offences, or investigating other police matters. I’d love to see some improvement there, if it’s possible.
The second aspiration I have is for community groups to feel better equipped with identifying and influencing the behaviours and actions, amongst their families and friendship groups, that might lead to unnecessary conflict at home and inside intimate partner relationships. Because sporting groups and community groups are so central to our specific community, there’s lots of opportunities to see those signs and signals and a number of groups have raised the issue with me, and indicated they’d like to feel better equipped to know what to do, before an issue even arise. This project will seek to help that.
Finally, and possibly most importantly, the third aspiration is more personal. I’m a dad of three boys under 15 who will grow up to be young men, and then old men. As a person in a position of influence, even though it can some days be limited to sorting out pathways and potholes and playgrounds, I want to set an example for my kids. When my boys grow up, I want to be able answer their question; “Dad, what did you actually try to do about this community issue?” with a genuine effort, backed by honest narrative and professional experience, and full of insights from years of scientific and psychological research, with practical suggestions that families can implement and apply in their own lives. I’m confident Griffith University and MATE Bystander program can deliver just that!
I do hope you’ll walk humbly with me during this effort, looking for ways to show compassion and mercy when we can, and when the time is right, bring a bit of justice and accountability into the way we love one another. Thanks for being here tonight as we start this project.”
Our aspiration is to have every community group in Division 9 be better equipped to identify and deal with the risks and impact of domestic and family abuse in our area.
We’d love to have your community group involved at this upcoming information session on Friday 21 July.
The subsequent training program, for which we will be seeking expressions of interest from local community groups, will include a RTO accreditation and a network of experienced and qualified mentors who can help you and your community group grow and learn about about best to manage situations that arise.
Together, I know we can make a difference in our community.